I feel that I still have things to catch you up on.
I don’t really want to dwell in the past, about the two weeks that Moses spent in the hospital in November, but I feel that I still need to talk about it because it helps with my process.
I always wonder about the meaning of things… why things happen… the message behind events… what are the lessons?
Why did Moses get so sick and why did he go so deep, after a period of time when he was doing so well.
I have some ideas.
It occurred right before 11-11-11, during the 2 week period immediately following October 28, 2011 (which marked the end of the Mayan calendar, according to some interpretations). It was a time of great light / big energy / huge shifts. Somehow, I feel that time in the hospital symbolized a time for us as a family to be sequestered, away from normal life, away from work and to be together as family.
Certainly some things fell away at that time. It marked a time for me to release some of my old roles, to make space for changes in my life. Self care became a priority.
I feel a real shift occurred for the whole family.
Throughout that period, I felt in my heart that Moses would be okay. That helped me get through that time.
I certainly felt a lot of anger towards the medical system and loss of power. I’m still trying to figure out how to stand in my power, stand up for my son and what I feel he needs, especially when it conflicts with the medical professionals’ opinions.
It’s difficult too because my husband goes to a place of fear during this time, and we often stand divided, not together in how we want to approach things (he’s fearful that I won’t let any medical interventions occur, and I’m angry that he is allowing the medical interventions occur).
I feel that Moses got so sick because of the “just in case” IV antibiotics that he received for four days and the lack of sleep during this time as we travelled back and forth to the hospital during all hours of the day and at night. My boy is a sensitive boy, whose homeostatis gets out of whack easily.
I didn’t mention this earlier, but during that time, Moses was also clearing one of the chronic miasms, sycosis, related to his Heilkunst homeopathic healing. Obviously a huge one for him to clear.
Sycosis is one of the eight chronic miasms, or archetypal diseases.
Sycosis is related to excesses in mind and tissue. People with an active sycosis miasm are susceptible to vaccine damage.
The main expression of sycosis is excess in all areas. You may have an increased appetite for food, excitement, action. Sycosis is the root of most “-itis” diseases, with inflammation and copious discharge. Memory problems and slowness are typical.
Sycosis is related to a host of conditions involving the prefix “hyper” (duh… Moses’ diagnosis is hyper IgE syndrome). It’s related to blood disorders (Moses has a second diagnosis, G-6-PD deficiency, which makes his blood susceptible to hemolysis, which actually happened during his time in the hospital as well). Ironically, it’s also related to blood transfusions and Moses needed a blood transfusion during our time in the hospital.
Prior to the clearing, his homeopath didn’t think this miasm would be difficult to clear, and I had hoped that she was right (but had suspected that it would be a big one). I had remembered that early in Moses’ treatment, she mentioned that this miasm was active in Moses (e.g., showing up in the abscesses he used develop), but to a lesser extent than the Syphilis or Tuberculosis miasms.
Four days after we started clearing sycosis, Moses developed the dental abscess, which led us down this road. I think it eventually developed into pneumonia due to his body’s response to all of the suppression that was occurring (IV antibiotics, anti-fever medication, etc.). Our Heilkunstler mentioned that Moses’ sustentive power (his life force that works hard to bring his body back to balance) is now so much stronger and the large pneumonia that resulted was evidence of his body trying hard to rid itself of toxins and come back into balance. I think our time in the hospital was also so long because the homeopathic remedies that he was taking to counter act all of the medical interventions were bringing out strong responses. Responses that the medical system mistook as illness, but was actually his body trying hard to come back into wellness.
It wasn’t an easy ride to take. I consulted with many of my own healers / health practitioners about it after. Some admonished me that I didn’t stand in my power enough. I knew that the medical interventions were going to be difficult on my son and I stayed silent and seethed inwards with anger at a system that doesn’t understand how healing works, but mostly angry at my own silence.
I’ve forgiven myself. I have to. And I’m not sure what I would do different if I had to walk that path again. I feel like a crazy person sometimes because I know that some of the things that I think sound so foolish to many people. Most people don’t understand homeopathy, and Heilkunst, I think is particularly difficult to understand. And yet it is working. This “foolishness” is actually leading my son to true, deep and remarkable healing.
Although I’ve shared so much on this blog, I still feel so vulnerable sharing. Scared that someone in the medical profession, one of Moses’ doctors may come across my blog and read it. Scared that they will think that some of my thoughts are not only foolish, but harmful to my son.
And yet the truth, the real truth is that Moses is healing. And he is healing not as a result of all of the medical interventions, but in spite of the medical interventions. (And I say this with great respect because I know some of our children need to use medical interventions to survive and to thrive. I am merely sharing my own truth of my son’s situation).
The scary thing is that Moses has only cleared two levels of sycosis (there are four levels to clear in total). I stopped the sycosis powders when he was in the hospital and we still need to clear the next two levels. I had planned to do so in January, giving us all a much needed and well deserved break over Christmas.
It’s obviously not an easy path, but it is a path that has brought remarkable healing for my son.